Do You Really Want To Hurt Me?
by xDarkArchAngel
Summary: When Squirrelflight found out about the death of Ashfur, she becomes devastated. Thoughts of when her & Ashfur were together keep creeping into her mind. But, no matter whenever she shakes off the thoughts, they always come back & makes her feel guilty, but it was for the best to go their separate ways. Squirrelflight has to focus on her Clan duties after all, right?
1. Prologue

**Prologue**

It was late evening, the sun was just about to disappear for the day, and the stars were becoming more visible in the beautiful night sky. Squirrelflight and Ashfur were sitting close together beside the warriors den, leaning both their heads together and smiling at each other, "You know I'll never leave you...You mean the whole world to me, and I would do anything for you!" He emphasized the anything, and entwined his tail with hers. Squirrelflight felt uncertain on the inside, but she purred and buried her head into his chest fur. She looked up at Ashfur, with her eyes twinkling with joy, his was, too. "I love you, too, you little furball," she joked around, and Ashfur softly put his paw on hers. They held that position for a few heartbeats while looking up at the stars. Then, they both turned around and walked into the warriors den together and fallen asleep within several heartbeats. Leafpool, Squirrelflight's sister, had shot a few glances at them with kind eyes while they exchanged heartwarming words between the two lovers.

Two moons later during the day, Squirrelflight and Leafpool were talking to each other. While Ashfur was on a border patrol with Cloudtail, Dustpelt, and Spiderleg.

When the group had come back, Squirrelflight had turned around to see Ashfur padding up to her. She had an unusual expression on her face, and Ashfur saw it, his instant smile turned into a frown. He became confused, "Squirrelflight, what's wrong?" , Squirrelflight let her tail droop to the forest floor, and she was was unsure of what she was going to say. She looked at the earthly ground and looked back up at him with regret, as if she still loved him. She frowned, "Ashfur, I don't love you, anymore." Ashfur laughed as if she said something that made him giggle a good bit. Then it hit him, he opened his eyes from laughing and frowned, " y-you serious?" , his heart beating with fear and sadness. "Yes, Ashfur...I wouldn't lie." Right then and there, his heart shattered into a billion pieces. He got up and walked off with his tail dragging on the ground.

A few days later, he came up to her, "I just realized something." Squirrelflight, however, did not look up at him, but kept her eyes past him, feeling slightly irritated, "What?" Ashfur looked at her, " I realized that you still act like a little kit." When Squirrelflight heard him say that, her anger started to boil inside of her. She looked him straight in the eye with eyes as narrow as a hawk. She stood up and walked away to get some fresh air outside of ThunderClan camp.

(A\N: So, that's the end of the prologue! & the reason I titled the fanfic as Do You Really Want to Hurt Me is because of a song I know & that I really like. It's an old 80s song by Culture Club. & it reminds me alot about Ashfur & Squirrelflight. & it's funny how it came to be that how they came to be, splitting up & becoming mates again. & exactly how they act around each other. Because I had a very similar situation as Squirrelflight & Ashfur. Anyways, this is my first fanfic. However, I will accept any criticism & fixes for help. Hope you enjoyed!)


	2. Chapter 2: Death & Regretful Pain

(A\N: Before I start chapter 1, I want to thank my faithful friend\reviewer, Irishgirl07!

Alright. Time for chapter 1)

Chapter 1: The death and regretful pain

Squirrelflight's POV:

The Firey colored she-cat opened her mouth to draw in the scent to a delcicious vole, "I smell a vole!" Squirrelflight excitedly whispers to her apprentice, Foxpaw, and her old mentor, Dustpelt, who were all on a hunting patrol. Squirrelflight heard the soft sound of scratching. She stalked closer to the sound quietly, and lowered herself with her tail up, hind legs ready to pounce. She slowly inched forward, once she thought she was close enough, she leapt up in the air, and landed right in front of the vole, she unsheeathed her claws & pinned it down, while it was squirming in desperate escape, but Squiurrelflight smirked at the helpless little piece of prey. She lowered her head down to it's neck to bite it until she heard a snap from its neck, its body went limp.

She turned around to see Dustpelt and Foxpaw waiting, with already caught prey. Dustpelt with a big, fat squirrel, and Foxpaw with a mouse just as small as her apprentices paw. Foxpaw and Dustpelt exchanged glances with a smirk, only to look back at Squirrelflight, "Nice catch!" they both said at the same time to Squirrelflight, "Jee, thanks, guys!", even though, to her, it wasn't much of a big deal. It was just a one small piece of prey. But her apprentice and her mentor always made her feel good about herself. They picked up their pieces of prey, and headed back towards ThunderClan camp.

At the camp:

"All cats old enough to catch their own prey gather beneath the high-ledge for a clan meeting!" Firestar yowled, standing on the high-ledge, waiting for the cats to gather around.

The warrior followed through, first. The deputy, Brambleclaw right beside the high-ledge. The apprentices sat right outside of the apprentice den. "As some of you know," Firestar started, "that the dusk patrol from last night, had found Ashfur's dead body near the lake. We don't know if he was unlucky from a confroted patrol from a different Clan, or if he was attacked by something else." he also added, before murmurs of mixed chattered meows erupted. "We will hold a silent vigil for the brave warrior tonight. May he walk in the paws of StarClan." He finished as he leapt down the high-ledge.

Leafpool had Ashfur's body in her medicine den, hidden before vigil started.

There was a rustle at the camp entrance. Leafpool, Firestar, and his mate, Sandstorm, turned around when they heard the rustling. Of course Foxpaw came trodding in, first. Bouncing happily with his caught prey, and put the prey in the fresh-kill pile. Dustpelt came through next, put his in the fresh-kill pile, aswell, and padded off to see his mate, Ferncloud. She told Dustpelt about the meeting that they had.

Last but not least came Squirrelflight, she padded in and set the fresh-kill in the pile. She looked around, confused about the chatter that's going on. She padded up to Mousefur, the elder, who was outside of the elders den, getting the nice breeze. "Mousefur, what happened?"

"We had a Clan meeting right before you came back fro hunting, and found out that Ashfur died yesterday evening." She stated.

Squirrelflight's expression became dismayed, with her pupils dilated. "Why could that possibly happen?" She exclaimed, in distress. "We aren't very sure of why or how it happened." Squirrelflight became very disappointed. Why have I ever done this to hurt Ashfur so badly? Days after we split, he said the meanest things to me such as ' I realized that you still act like a little kit' or 'I don't even know if i even trust you as a friend, anymore' and he called me bad names before spreading rumors around like wild fire that was never even true.

'By the time you want to admit that you still love me, i'll already be gone' is something that rings in her head the most, next to 'it's time to move on'

But yet, I still felt so sad that he's gone now. Why would I be sad if he's been so mean to me before he died?

But as she snapped out of her thoughts, she had just enough time to see Leafpool turned around to face her sister outside of the medicine cat den. Leafpool had recognized her sister's upset expression and beckoned her over with her tail. Squirrelflight slowly padded towards Leafpool.

Leafpool set her tail on Squirrelflight's should to comfort her, "I'm so sorry to you see you this upset, Squirrelflight. You can give things a break for today and rest, if you need." Squirrelflight rested her head on Leafpool's shoulder, "Thank you, Leafpool. I'm lucky I have you as a sister."

"Just don't think about it so much, I hate to see you so upset." Leafpool mewed to her sister, Squirrelflight, "And plus, You still have our mother and father. Firestar and Sandstorm. You also have Brambleclaw, now."

Squirrelflight smiled at the thought of Brambleclaw and remembered what Leafpool told her about the prophecy in her dream. The pawprints that were in Leafpool's dream had resembled Brambleclaw and Squirrelflight, and that nothing could ever break them apart. She smiled at the thought.

Plus, she can't think of just that, she's also a warrior who also has to look out for her clan, and the safety of it.


End file.
